On Display, The Narcissist View

I love being observed. It is like the day after Christmas when you are showing off your new toys -- my classroom is my new cabbage patch kid that I desperately want to share.

On Display

Being observed by teachers from other schools is a compliment, a pain, and a kick in the butt. It's validating as a teacher to have others come to see what we are doing. At the same time, it's a bit of a hassle to have others in our room frequently. The kids are fairly used to it, but it throws them off a little. It also means we deviate from our normal plans sometimes to be sure our guests are seeing the components of reading and writing workshop that are important to them. It's also motivating. I can't slack off on teaching when others are there. I've got to have each piece of the workshop thought out and organized. I'll do a focus lesson, reading conferences, a guided reading group, and share - mostly because people are coming to see it.

My problem is guided reading. It used to feel great, now it feels stale, boring, and tedious. The kids still seem to enjoy it, but I can't get motivated. Maybe it's because these kids are strong readers, they don't need a lot of support from me. Maybe it's because I've been doing it for a while and I need new energy for it. Maybe it's just because I'm tired and it's the last straw. For whatever reason it isn't working for me.

Staying Home Sick was More Fun When I was Eight

I think my small intestines knotted themselves up in such away that they needed my stomach to complete the big fancy bow maneuver that would REALLY impress my colon. My stomach is beyond confused -- there is enough of it not in the fancy bow to feel hungry, yet no where for the food to go but up. And the food that does manage to wiggle through the bow does not seem to be enjoying the joy ride down. The rest of my body, jealous I assume from the small intestines obvious favoritism to the colon, cramps, tightens, and stiffens as it fights to untangle the love bow.

My options of What To Do are limited - curl up in a ball and pretend to sleep, curl up in a ball and pretend to read, or curl up in a ball and pretend to watch t.v. When I was eight, this would have been almost heaven -- snuggled with my softest blanket and some gatorade, I would hunker down for the day in a fort of books and pillows. I might even watch a movie or two.

Now, as a teacher, I am confined to curling up in a ball and worry. Did I email back those parents? Should I grade those papers? Did I mention the calendar routine in my plans? Will my students behave? Will they stay on task? Will they understand the sorting activity? Will they grow as learners and discover themselves as thinkers if I am not there to guide them???

I know the classroom will not come to crashing halt, ending all of civilization, because I am out with the flu. It just feels that way.

It Seems Wrong that We're Starting this on a Monday

Especially a Monday that we left school early. But this looks like it's going to be a hard week.

Thanks central office for your input and guidance on what should go on in our classrooms.

Love,
Tree & Jenny